Tag: Cardo

Distinguished Gentlemen! (and Ladies)

MUSTALGIA ON THE SANTA MONICA PIER

There’s a comically oversized guy on a small, beat-up old Lambretta. He says he’s in for the ride. He has a complete set of floodlights attached to the old Italian scooter that would scare Bambie a mile away. It’s not even noon. I can only wonder how he made it so far up the pier. Another one shows up on a Bonneville. He’s dressed up in a full three-piece vintage suit, complete with a matching pocket handkerchief and a well-groomed dandy mustache. It’s Santa Monica, and the Southern California sun is beating down our heads. Nobody seems to mind the inadequacy. A third shows up in a side-cart Bimmer. He, his wife, and the little kid are all in Tigger suits. Somehow, that passes almost as normal. Welcome to the Distinguished Gentlemen Ride, a magnet for the Hipsters, the nostalgics, and the downright eccentric.

With over 500 motorcycles, it’s a weird spectacle of American proportions.

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Bucket-list item #4 – Sturgis

WHERE HALF A MILLION BIKERS COME TO PARTY

Harry is the world’s biggest dick. No, not figuratively as in “ass hole,” but literally as in “two-meter-high standing Pekker”. Cocks aside, Harry is really a nice dude with a friendly disposition to all who pass by. He’s just another massive guy that happens to clad himself in an inflatable penis outfit, complete with a set of two giant balls to keep him company. Not anything out of the ordinary in this crazy, unreal place. Standing on a busy street corner, he hands out small purple penis necklaces to whoever cares to drop by. I stop by for a quick chat with Harry, take a lovely photo of him and his wife, get the odd-looking freebee, and move on. In this shrine to in-your-face individuality, and like-or-not freedom of expression, Harry’s unorthodox costume hardly makes a ripple.

Muslims go to Mecca. Hindus have the Ganges River. Hasidic Jews pilgrim to Mt. Meron for a nightly feast. The Vatican is where Catholic Christians look for inspiration. And bikers? Harley worshipers? V-Twin aficionados? Where do they go to pray?

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